UN Recognizes FairPrice Tissue Packets as Sovereign National Borders

The United Nations has formally declared that a packet of Virgin Soft tissues constitutes a legally binding claim of territorial sovereignty.

Any grease-stained table at Maxwell Food Centre is now officially recognized as an independent micronation protected by the Geneva Convention.

International law experts confirm that a half-empty packet of 7-Eleven wet wipes is more effective at securing land than a fully-equipped standing army.

"Eh, hello, you blind is it, I put my tissue there since 10am, even the King also cannot sit there, you know?" screamed Mdm Lim, 67.

"This one my ancestral land now, you touch I make your life miserable like waiting for Grab during rain," she added while sharpening a pair of chopsticks.

The Ministry of Defence is reportedly considering replacing its entire tank division with a strategic reserve of Aloe Vera scented 3-ply packs.