Sinkies Judge Oscar Fashion While Wearing Faded Uniqlo Shirts

The 98th Academy Awards red carpet has provided the annual golden opportunity for Singaporeans to viciously critique international millionaires while lounging in sweat-stained Uniqlo Airism singlets.

As a famous actress paraded a pink Chanel ball skirt, local keyboard warriors noted the ruffles bore a striking resemblance to the premium toilet paper found in Marina Bay Sands.

The 'Best Actor' winner’s custom suit with a stand collar was swiftly dismissed by a heartland fashion critic for being "low-effort".

"Abit too much pattern leh! Look like my waiter uncle at the wedding dinner, but with more ego," remarked one unemployed bystander.

Ultimately, Singaporeans find Hollywood glamour fundamentally useless as most gowns lack sufficient pocket space for a bottle of Tiger Balm.