Sinkies Devastated: Only Real Bloodsuckers Left Are Their Bosses

The cancellation of the Buffy reboot has plunged Singapore into a deep depression, as locals were desperate for a 48-year-old star to finally stake their parasitic managers.

Hulu’s decision to kill the project proves that even the Chosen One is no match for the true lord of darkness: corporate budget cuts.

"Sian man, I thought Buffy could slay the literal demons in my HR department," lamented one sleep-deprived office worker.

Without a fictional slayer to offer hope, Singaporeans must return to the grim reality of being slowly drained of life by fluorescent lighting and unpaid overtime.

"Buffy retire, but my boss still suck my blood every day leh," complained a local victim.

The director confirmed some things stay dead, much like the souls of everyone commuting on the MRT.