
Sinkie Tutor Confused After Receiving $2,888 Red Packet Instead Of Verbal Abuse
A local university student was hospitalized for shock after receiving a $2,888 red packet instead of the usual passive-aggressive WhatsApp messages regarding their tutee’s failing Math grades.
The "token of appreciation" was apparently a reward for turning a "hopeless longkang boy" into a slightly less disappointing exam-taking machine.
The tutor initially suspected the cash was drug money or a sophisticated CPF withdrawal scam before realizing some Singaporeans actually have too much money and zero parenting skills.
"I honestly thought they were paying me to sit for the PSLE on the kid's behalf," the tutor admitted while clutching the thick stack of notes.
The mother clarified that the sum was a small price to pay for not having to acknowledge her own son’s existence for three hours every Tuesday.
Experts say this marks a new era where Sinkies would rather bankrupt themselves than admit their offspring are biologically average.
This satire is based on a real news story.
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