Singaporean Women Offer Healthy Ankles To BTS Leader Following Comeback Injury

The release of BTS’s comeback album Arirang has successfully triggered a nationwide psychiatric crisis among Singaporean women who haven’t felt joy since 2023.

Despite the lead single sounding like a blender full of industrial synthesisers, local fans have spent 72 hours decoding the deep meaning behind a 98-second recording of a literal bell.

RM’s minor ankle injury has prompted local "ARMY" chapters to offer their own healthy limbs as ritual sacrifices to the K-pop gods.

"Wah lau, my heart really pain leh, RM ankle hurt I also feel the bone crack," sobbed 34-year-old Cheryl Tan, ignoring her husband’s actual slipped disc.

BigHit Music confirmed that while RM cannot dance, he will remain the only personality trait for millions of functional adults.