Singaporean Woman Hospitalised Following Brutal Street Fight With Signboard

Chinatown’s reputation for high-stakes drama reached a fever pitch this week when a local woman was decisively defeated by a two-metre tall price list.

The victim, a clinic owner with a grudge and low light tolerance, reportedly engaged in a three-year blood feud with a neighbouring foot reflexology board.

Witnesses claim the woman attempted to assert dominance by kicking the plastic structure, only to succumb to the board’s terrifying ability to stand perfectly still.

"I see her kick and shout like siao char bor," noted one bystander.

"Then police come, she suddenly act like she dying, lie down on stretcher for what? The board more solid than her ego, sia."

The signboard remains in stable condition.