Singaporean Couple Sells Firstborn To Fund Minimalist Living Room Renovation

Local banks have officially introduced a "70-year generational mortgage" for homeowners wishing to afford a single marble kitchen island.

Renovation interest rates have climbed so high that Interior Designers are now legally classified as organised crime syndicates.

Most Singaporeans are now choosing the "Extreme Minimalist" aesthetic, which involves living in a cardboard box inside an empty flat.

"I just wanted one gold tap, but now my bank account got negative five figures," lamented local resident, Tan Ah Kow.

"My ID tell me 'Industrial Look' is in, but actually he just didn't finish the flooring and charged me fifty-k for the 'raw feel', win liao lor!"

The Monetary Authority of Singapore suggests that citizens consider selling non-essential organs to cover the cost of a built-in wardrobe.

Experts predict that by 2025, a basic light fixture will require a sovereign wealth fund injection to install.