Singapore NS Recruit Suffering Severe Withdrawal Symptoms After Last Field Camp

Following his final field camp on Pulau Tekong, Corporal Lim has been found digging a shellscrape in his Toa Payoh living room. Despite the humidity and the lingering scent of ‘maggie mee’ flavoured sweat, Lim claims he misses the intimacy of sharing a groundsheet with three other sweaty men and a SAR 21.

"Eh, home got air-con but still feel weird sia," Lim sobbed, seasoning his dinner with Snake Brand Prickly Heat powder. "I miss my Encik screaming at me for being a 'blur cock' at 3 AM. Now my mother just ask if I want Milo. Where is the tekan? Where is the suffering?"

Psychiatrists suggest Lim is suffering from ‘Stockholm Syndrome: Tekong Edition’. His Commanding Officer commented: "This fella really siao one. Last time in jungle cry like baby, now want to sleep with mosquito. Don't act blur lah, wait until he go reservist then he really know!"