Singapore Man Hospitalised After Mistaking First Date Jitters For Stroke

Local singleton Lim Kopi was rushed to Singapore General Hospital yesterday after experiencing a terrifying medical phenomenon known as "a feeling."

Doctors initially feared a lethal combination of heatstroke and bubble tea withdrawal before realising Lim was simply enduring first-date jitters.

The 29-year-old reportedly began convulsing when his date, a woman who actually replied to his "Hi" on Tinder, suggested they might share a dessert.

Witnesses claim Lim’s sweat production reached levels previously only seen in SAF recruits during a 24km route march.

"Wah piang, the guy shaking like vibrator sia," remarked bystander Tan Ah Lian.

"I thought he having stroke, then I see his date touch his hand and he start making noises like dying cat."

The Ministry of Health has since issued a national advisory warning men that a slight increase in heart rate does not necessarily require a DNR order.

Lim remains in stable condition, though he has requested a restraining order against his own libido to prevent further trauma.

"Next time I just stay home play MLBB better, don't want die of heart attack for one plate of pasta," Lim sobbed.