Pussy Recruit Surrenders SAR21 To Alpha Macaque After Sustaining Fierce Hiss

The Singapore Armed Forces has officially declared the local macaque population a superior fighting force after a recruit surrendered his rifle to a monkey.

During a navigation exercise, Recruit Tan reportedly abandoned his SAR21 and his dignity because a long-tailed macaque “glared at him like a loan shark.”

“Lanjiao, the monkey eyes like red-dot sight sia, I give him my field pack then I run road lor!” sobbed the recruit while hiding in a portable toilet.

Commanders are now forced to treat wild boars as high-ranking officers after an entire platoon was held hostage by a single sow looking for biscuits.

“These chao recruits think they so siong, but one monitor lizard crawl past and they scream like little girls,” remarked Third Sergeant Lim.

MINDEF is currently considering replacing all enciks with Tekong cobras to finally instil some actual fucking discipline in these pussies.