PM Wong Sucks Up To China For Higher Social Credit

Prime Minister Lawrence Wong has officially transitioned from Singapore’s leader to China’s most enthusiastic, uncompensated PR intern.

Speaking at the Boao Forum, Wong spent his keynote address aggressively glazing China’s "critical role" in global tech, presumably while hoping for an immediate boost to his social credit score.

The PM noted that China’s cultural influence is expanding via digital platforms, confirming that the Cabinet has officially replaced their daily briefings with TikTok dances.

"Wah lau, he talk until like that, I thought he was applying for a job as Xi’s personal hype man," said local resident Tan Ah Kow.

"Next time he will tell us that eating mala is a national security requirement, damn jialat man," added another citizen.

Wong concluded that Singapore is ready to embrace China’s "new rules," which most experts translate as "please don’t turn us into a parking lot."