New Singapore Medical Disorder: Refusing To Eat Your Damn Vegetables

Singaporean parents are celebrating a revolutionary breakthrough in childhood development: the ability to turn "being a brat" into a legitimate clinical diagnosis.

Local medical experts have confirmed that children are now suffering from a condition where the sight of a zucchini causes more physiological trauma than a failing grade.

The disorder allows "Sinkie" children to legally demand a diet consisting exclusively of beige carbs while their parents pay psychologists to negotiate with a middle-schooler.

"My son is a total genius," said one exhausted educator.

"He tell me his 'sensory sensitivity' mean he cannot touch broccoli, but strangely his mouth can detect a chicken nugget from three kilometres away, wah lau," she added.

"Last time my father use rotan, now I must use cognitive behavioural therapy for one small carrot, damn sian."