Migrating Birds To Singapore Demand Employment Pass To Land Legally

Thousands of migrating birds are currently descending upon Singapore, mistakenly believing the garden city is a paradise rather than a humid, overpriced pressure cooker.

These avian tourists are reportedly shocked to find that even a basic puddle in Sungei Buloh now requires a QR code check-in and a pre-booked time slot.

National Parks rangers have begun fining Arctic Warblers for failing to declare their worm imports at the border.

"Wah lau, these birds fly ten thousand kilometres just to shit on my Mercedes," complained local resident Lim Kopi.

"I tell you ah, they think they very 'tok kong' just because they can fly without a passport."

Authorities are considering installing ERP gantries on major flight paths to milk the birds for every cent before they head to Australia.

If the birds cannot prove they contribute to the national GDP, they will be summarily deported back to the Siberian tundra.