Local Man’s Decomposition Only Social Interaction He’s Had In Years

A 74-year-old Toa Payoh resident has finally trended in his neighborhood after successfully fermenting into a fine, pungent vintage within his Kim Keat flat.

Neighbours praised the man’s lifelong commitment to the “Mind Your Own Business” culture, noting they only realised he existed when his liquefied remains began a daring escape under the front door.

“Aiyoh, usually we don’t talk one, but that smell really got power, damn tulan man,” said one resident while frantically spraying Pandan-scented Febreze into the corridor.

The Sengkang woman reportedly joined the competitive decomposing trend later that afternoon, proving that Rivervale residents can also be equally antisocial and dead.

Police confirmed there was no foul play, as rotting quietly into the HDB floorboards is now the officially sanctioned retirement plan for the silver generation.

Authorities reminded seniors to please schedule their deaths closer to garbage collection days to minimise the olfactory impact on property prices.