Local Man Successfully Liquidates Entire Pancreas at $98 Seafood Buffet

Singaporeans are currently flocking to hotel buffets with the predatory intensity usually reserved for fleeing a burning building.

The latest culinary trend involves starving oneself for three days to ensure the $118++ price tag is recouped through sheer volume of chilled Alaskan King Crab.

Medical professionals report that the average diner’s blood type is now technically 'Sashimi Grade' with a lethal concentration of mercury.

"Wah lau, I tell you ah, he take the lobster like he fighting war one," said witness Tan Ah Kow.

"Must eat until the hotel rugi, if not my heart pain more than my stomach pain," the diner shrieked while secreting six crab claws into his cargo shorts.

The government is reportedly considering replacing the national anthem with the sound of a thousand oyster shells being shucked in desperation.

Ultimately, the national goal remains unchanged: to die of gout while feeling smug about the savings.