Grab Announces Temporary Two-Month Fare Hike That Will Definitely Last Forever

Grab Singapore confirmed today that its "temporary" two-month fare hike is a short-term measure designed to last until the sun eventually collapses.

The monopoly claimed the S$0.01 increase is a heartfelt gesture to support drivers during the Iran war, providing the perfect geopolitical excuse to squeeze eighty cents out of airport commuters.

"Wah lau, increase one cent for what? Might as well just take my whole wallet and go lah," said local commuter Jerry Teo.

A spokesperson explained the extra income would allow drivers to finally afford a single, high-quality toothpick for every fifty kilometres of driving.

Management remains committed to "supporting" drivers, mostly by finding new ways to describe corporate greed as humanitarian aid.