Exhausted Singaporeans spend thousands at SLEEPLAB to simulate death

Metro Paragon has opened a 10,000-square-foot "SLEEPLAB" to help work-ravaged Singaporeans remember what it feels like to be unconscious without a medical prescription.

The luxury space offers handcrafted French mattresses and Korean pyjamas, providing a premium environment for professionals to weep quietly about their non-existent work-life balance.

"Siao ah, I spend three hundred dollars on scented candles and I still dreaming about Excel spreadsheets," noted local clerk Cheryl Lim while staring blankly at a $200 bottle of La Mer.

Management confirmed the immersive 60-metre LED "Theatre of Dreams" was specifically calibrated to distract Sinkies from the soul-crushing reality of their daily commute.

Analysts suggest that paying $5,000 for a bed is currently the most popular way for locals to pretend they aren't actually dead inside.