Delusional Sinkie Buys $4M Strata Unit To House Single Cockroach

Local property visionary Lim Kopi recently purchased a prestigious four-square-foot strata unit in a mall that smells exclusively of mothballs and geriatric despair.

The $3.2 million investment, located strategically between a defunct maid agency and a leaking pipe, is expected to achieve break-even status by the year 2350.

Lim plans to subdivide the unit into four "executive suites" to accommodate start-ups that consist entirely of a single USB stick.

Market analysts believe the windowless dungeon is ideally suited for a money-laundering front disguised as an artisanal air-selling boutique.

"Wah lau, this one high-SES asset leh, can feel the passive income flowing like my back sweat," Lim remarked while wedging his left buttock into the shopfront.

"Next time I buy the toilet cubicle also, then I really king of commercial empire liao."